As I see the push and pull so clearly in numbers here and am poisoned by violent wishes, sitting in the same park I walked away from you a couple weeks ago, when nothing was as bad as today. I remember everything and state again and again, it's for the best.
How come you're not here, with all these people just like you and her and her as well, and the friend you said you're helping too? I have so little faith in you that I don't even believe you were just with her, but it wasn't a lie, cause it was on Friday, not the Saturday twin.
I'm in so much pain, I'm so alone. I'm so alone, I'm so alone.
Fucking bitch, just being sorry for myself, what an idiot, insoportable.
I wish I had a drink, sitting here alone, in pain, cold, I wish I had two drinks, three and four, just lie here until I merge with the soil, forget everything and anything. Bitch.
I will sit here for 20 minutes, you won't see this in that long today since you haven't checked it obsessively like other times. It's for the best. I need to let go.
Caught - Florence & the Machine.